Needless to say, sex is an important part of a relationship. You must have read a lot of tips on how to pick up, court, and date women but there are a lot of things you need to know in order to be good in bed. Sex is all about getting and giving pleasure. It means you should focus more on your woman than on yourself. Many guys have only their interests in mind and ignore their partners’ desires. It can be the reason why they are not successful in bed. However, every guy can improve his sex skills and become a dream lover. What do you need for that? Change your attitude and learn a few techniques.
Men and Women: Basic Differences
The first thing you need to know is that your sexual response will be different from your partner’s one simply because your bodies and attitudes to sex are different.
Women can have a series of orgasms during one sexual intercourse while you can’t. This is pure physiology and it has nothing to do with self-training, attitude, or mood.
- Warm-up period.
She needs more time to warm up and become that close to the climax. While you’re almost there, she could be only at the initial stage of her excitement. This time difference is especially tangible when you don’t know each other well enough yet. The higher the level of trust and intimacy between you, the faster she’ll get excited.
Women have more spots to stimulate than men. Also, some women prefer intensive stimulation, while with others, a lighter one works better. The speed of her response will depend on her experience and insecurities she has or doesn’t have.
How to Become a Great Lover
Even if you think that you don’t have any problems with your sex life, there is always room for improvement. Your woman will be grateful to you if you start using the following tips actively.
Take your time. Women like it when men do it slowly. Don’t jump on her at once but start with foreplay. Use your hands and lips extensively. Remember, she needs to warm up to get the most out of the process. Slowly but surely is the best strategy here.
Be attentive. Let your hands explore her body. As your hands caress different parts of her firm body, pay attention how her muscles and her breathing react to your moves. Experiment with different levels of pressure to figure out which parts are more responsive to gentle touching and which ones turn on when you go harder.
Let anticipation kindle your passion. Although it might be difficult to resist temptation, try to have a light version of sex (without penetration) once a week. Allow only touching, kissing, and oral sex or masturbation. The trick is that you should prevent yourself from orgasm in order to experience unbelievable satisfaction next time when you’ll do everything you want.
Resort to massage. Become a private masseur for your partner. Massage is a great idea to start off, relax, and feel each other’s bodies. It’s generally useful for your sex life because it helps you create a greater intimacy and learn your partner’s body.
Activate your senses. Touching is a necessary tool while making love but you need to involve other senses to have high-quality sex. Use scented oils for massage, turn on some relaxing or romantic music, and light up the candles to create an appropriate atmosphere in your bedroom. You can even eat something sweet, strawberries for instance, and then have a prolonged kiss during which you’ll taste each other’s lips.
Seduce her with your voice. If you want her, whisper it in her ear. You can either voice your intimate intentions or only hint at your desire by whispering something sweet and pleasant. It can be also done over the phone. If you’re away from home and you look forward to seeing your loved one, call her and talk to her in a low and sexy voice. You can also text or send an email writing some naughty or sexy things to enhance the excitement.
Be outspoken. If a couple has healthy sex life, they are not afraid of sharing their fantasies and desires. They want their sex to be satisfying and pleasant for both. That’s why they tell each other about their erogenous zones and which positions work for them better. These conversations are very useful since you reveal each other’s turn-ons.
Break the routine. Sex stops bringing much pleasure when it becomes monotonous: the same settings, ordinary foreplay, and old positions. Relive this monotony by having sex in places other than your bedroom. You can start from a hotel room. Also, bring a moment of surprise to your sex life. For example, catch your lady the moment she comes out of the shower. It’s a bad idea to start seducing her in the kitchen while she cooks dinner. But when she leaves the bathroom, she’s relaxed, fresh, and confident. Pin her to the wall – she’ll gladly give herself up to you and will want more.
Master oral sex. Since your woman can get several orgasms during one intercourse, try different ways to please her. Cunnilingus will make a perfect lead-in to penetration. There are a lot of techniques – experiment and watch how your partner responds. If you manage to bring her satisfaction, it will encourage her to return the favor. You can also find some useful information on oral sex here: oral sex tips.
Never ask twice. The question “Are you enjoying?” can be asked only once. Otherwise, you’ll sound insecure.