Some folks think that compatibility is something fixed, and two people sharing interests, hobbies, and personalities are destined to be together forever and ever. But relying on those qualities and factors too much, you may find yourself feeling that when your love boat starts hitting rock after rock, all that’s left is to whine or abandon the sinking vessel. You can’t make yourself stop thinking ‘this relationship will never work because we’re not on the same page, so why the heck should I try to fix it?’
Here’s a little secret: a human being is much more than a set of character traits and food habits. It’s in our nature to change, grow, and (if we’re smart enough) learn all the time. Compatibility largely depends on the amount and quality of time you spend together, your willingness to share, as well as your desire to work on your relationship as a team and not on numerology or shady articles telling what signs are compatible.
Sure, it’s great if you have some things and traits in common from the start, but these are usually ideas, beliefs, values, that kind of thing – all this matters. And even in this case, you should still put some effort into the relationship, nurture it and make sure nothing threatens its, well, integrity.
Alright, enough of that shrink stuff. If you’re curious how compatible you are, just check out our relationship compatibility quiz. It might help you figure out if your values are the same, whether both of you put enough effort to keep your sacred union of hearts or not, and understand what to do if one of you lags behind.
Question 1: Do you and your loved one share a common vision of your future?
b) Not right now. We love surprises.
c) For the most part. Haven’t discussed everything yet, though.
d) Definitely yes. We just can’t shut up about our future plans.
We’re not even sure if we need to explain to you how important a common vision of your future is. Let’s say that you urgently need to go to Detroit (what in the world would you be doing in Detroit?!). Whatever, you go online, but instead of buying the ticket you need, you book the first flight you see and find yourself on a plane to Denver. What’s the difference, right? Besides, both start with ‘D.’ The same goes for joint plans for the future. How can you build a sturdy foundation for a relationship when you’re not sure if your partner’s goals are the same and have no idea how they see themselves in a few years. So instead of wasting time reading about what zodiac signs are compatible, have a chat with your significant other and sort things out.
Question 2: Your chatty aunt Doris asks you how compatible you are as a couple. Your answer?
a) Err… We’re just hanging out. Guess I should give it some thought.
b) Can’t say we share much in common, but we’re doing fine.
c) Well, there are some flaws, but we’re a pretty much solid couple.
d) Some part of me still thinks that she/he’s my long lost twin.
You can print the results of this quiz and throw it in your curious auntie’s face. Maybe this will make her stop asking too many questions. But seriously, it’s good for a relationship to just make a pause for a moment and look at your couple from the outside. Sometimes you don’t need a love compatibility quiz to figure out if your hearts beat as one. Things tend to change over time, so even if you were certain that there was something in common at first, your partner may have changed since then. And if you’ve never thought about how much you share in common, then congrats! Looks like you bought that ticket to Denver, after all. Enjoy your flight! A life jacket is under your seat.
Question 3: Would you say that your political views match?
a) Not at all! This topic is a taboo.
b) We always argue, defending our points of view.
c) We manage to end our arguments without calling the cops. Mostly.
d) Surprisingly, most of our views are similar, and we never quarrel over those that differ.
For some reason, not that many couples consider differences in political views a threat to their relationships. We wonder how many of them fell apart when one found out that the other voted for Trump. It takes a lot of skill to win the elections and ruin half of politically aware couples in America. Back to the point. Keep in mind that some people can’t just cope with the fact that their loved ones support parties and politicians they hate. To eliminate all possible misunderstandings and ensure total love compatibility, ask your companion about their political views. If both of you don’t care about politics, then don’t bother.
Question 4: What about religion? Does it cause arguments?
a) We try to avoid talking about it because our discussions always end with a fight.
b) Total disagreement. We keep arguing all the time.
c) There are some differences in views, but we’re coping with them just fine.
d) Our views and ideas are very similar, and God helps us accept the differences.
The religious aspect in a relationship can do much more harm than arguments over what TV show to watch. Some couples hardly see religion becoming the final nail in the coffin of their happy family life, especially in the early stages of a relationship. And then it strikes down upon them with great vengeance and furious anger when the two start fighting over some traditions or habits, like saying a prayer before dinner or how their wedding ceremony should look like. Sure, maybe there are more important things, such as birthday compatibility or beverage preferences, that define the happiness in a relationship, but it makes sense to find some common ground when it comes to religion. Even a Buddhist and Satanist can lie in harmony if both know how to compromise.
Question 5: How do both of you spare time together?
a) What? We should spare time together?
b) We both think that we don’t spare enough time together. And we keep quarreling over that.
c) Each of us minds their own business, and it actually works.
d) We learned to keep a steady balance between our own hobbies and interests we share.
No worries, it’s totally fine if you spend every nanosecond together if both of you feel comfortable that way. But when you start a relationship, it doesn’t mean that you and your beloved partner must develop some sort of hive mind and completely forget about your own interests. But it’s crucial for a healthy atmosphere within your couple to share some common hobbies. The best way to manage your free time is to separate the activities that you can’t enjoy together for some reason from those that you both find interesting and exciting and meet somewhere in the middle. Unless you’re one of those weirdoes who chose ‘c.’ You really think this can work? Oh, wait, our love compatibility test says it can. Ok, move on to the next question.
Question 6: Do you share ideas regarding raising a family?
a) Don’t know, don’t care.
b) This topic is a pain in the ass because we’re outright different.
c) We realize we won’t manage without compromises.
d) We’re one of those perfect couples who completely share views on parenting and discuss their values at dinner twice a week.
How to know if you are compatible if you haven’t figured out your visions of a future family? Let’s get back to that love boat metaphor. Imagine that your relationship is a monumental, unsinkable ship. Let’s call it Titanic. And your differences on views regarding kids and family are a small, inconspicuous iceberg… See our pint there? While you can compromise on such stuff as a joint pastime or political views, this trick won’t work for more responsible and adult aspects of a relationship. That’s why every compatibility test you can find online has this question. There’s nothing more to add.
Question 7: Would you say your sense of humor matches your partner’s?
b) It’s complicated. We usually end up arguing instead of laughing.
c) There’s definitely something in common.
d) A good sense of humor is what keeps us together!
What can be better than to share a laugh with your loved one when watching your favorite comedy show? What? You can’t stand each other’s favorite comedy shows? Well, then it definitely feels nice to make your special someone laugh their head off… What do mean they can’t stand your jokes? Oh… Uhm… Well, there’s nothing wrong with that. Yep, everything’s absolutely fine. You still share views on religion and stuff, right? After all, it’s just another mediocre are-we-compatible quiz. Let’s proceed.
Question 8: How easily do you agree on whose folks to visit during the holidays?
a) Each of us visits their own family.
b) We usually argue over that. Wait, that’s the eighth time I choose ‘b.’ Something’s not right.
c) We spend holidays together, leaving our poor parents alone. They’ll manage.
d) We just take it in turns.
First of all, yes, we consider that you may have just begun dating and haven’t spent any holiday together yet. But come on! Experienced couples also want to know how compatible they are. So just pick the answer you like most. It doesn’t mean a thing, anyway. Jokes aside, it’s situations like this that show your willingness to compromise and make your loved one happier. So what, can you find common language on this one? Are you compatible?
Question 9: Sexual compatibility quiz! How close are you in bed?
a) Just plain sex. Nothing special.
b) Guess I can say we’re passionate. Actually, we’ve always been good at sex.
c) Having cuddles, holding hands – that’s about us.
d) Nothing’s more important than intimacy.
There’s one question that keeps bothering couples all over the world: ‘Are we sexually compatible?’ You can answer it yourself easily. Just ask yourself and your partner if you’re both Ok with your intimate life. If not, then you should start doing something because this relationship aspect is actually one of the pillars of your happy life. That’s why you should not only have sex but talk about it too. You’d probably be upset if your one and only dumps you because of someone who understands their sexual desires better, right?
Question 10, the final and the most intimate one: Do your attitudes towards finances differ?
a) Talking about money? What a waste of time.
b) Our attitudes are pretty different and guess what? We argue about that!
c) We believe that the best way to avoid quarrels is to keep our finances separate.
d) We mostly agree on everything. Such important things as money deserve attention, so we discuss our finances all the time.
It’s hard to plan something ahead if one of you keeps spending money uncontrollably. On the other hand, if you manage to compromise and keep your budgets separate while building a long-lasting relationship, you might succeed, though the odds aren’t in your favor here. The best decision would be to form a joint budget each of you would use and replenish. At least this will allow you to keep spending money on underground snail fights without your partner nagging.
What all this stuff means
Alright, the time has come to check the results and see if the time you wasted on this quiz was worth it. So, how compatible are you?
Your answers are mostly A
It seems like both of you don’t talk to each other much because you’re afraid to find out that you’re totally different. Either that or you just don’t want to start another fight. Anyway, if things keep going this way, then sooner or later, you’ll have to admit that your relationship doesn’t work.
Your answers are mostly B
We don’t know if there’s another couple in the world with so many differences. You seem to argue over anything, but it’s most likely these differences that brought you together in the first place. Maybe you even felt excitement at first. But by now, you may have noticed that some differences have become annoying, and you’ve probably started to forget things you share in common. A reminder could revive your relationship.
Your answers are mostly C
The good thing is that you’re aware of each other’s weaknesses and strong suits and can easily compromise and reach an agreement in a tricky situation. But the problem is that sometimes, you might feel that you don’t have enough confidence to speak up if something bothers you and let the problem be for the sake of your union. At some point, you may begin feeling some resentment because your partner doesn’t acknowledge your feelings.
Your answers are mostly D
The similarity of your views and beliefs will never let your concrete relationship fall apart. You can be proud of yourself, as not every couple manages to achieve such incredible mutual understanding. But the most important thing is that both of you realize that your relationships needs to be constantly maintained and nurtured. You know that having the same tastes and preferences isn’t enough to build something reliable. Next time, instead of doing quizzes, you can just ask your companion, “How compatible are we?” We’re sure the answer will be precise.