Questions You Should Ask Yourself Before Making a Commitment
Are You Ready to Commit?
Long-term personal relationships require you to make a commitment. People involved in sensual romantic relationships approach each other individually. Relationships founded on solid grounds are the ones on with trust, respect, love, and care. A lot of people experience commitment issues. It is difficult to maintain stability in the relationships because the seriousness of making a commitment makes it challenging to stay close with your loved one.
What Are You To Each Other?
The first thing you need to realize and stick to is your future and your dreams. Plan your co-existence together into the future. Talk with your partner and try to adjust your personal desires, dreams, and life plans to each other. Your partner may want to have a house on the beach while your dream is to climb a mountain in the Himalayas. Adjust.
What is Commitment?
The value of personal commitment can be defined by the ability to share plans for the future with each other. Future is one of the most precious things a human being has. Having somebody to spend it with is the happiest thing imaginable. Commitment is the foundation of connection. When you ask yourself “Am I ready for commitment?” it means that you experience a certain responsibility for your partner. The question is whether you are going to take this responsibility or postpone taking it.
For everybody who is ready for commitment, future holds new prospects, achievements, and high hopes. People have expectations about their future. In order to continue being close in the future, partners who commit themselves to the relationship need to share their future with each other. You should have a place for your partner in your plans and that way you would have a right to be in the future of your partner as well.
What Keeps You Together?
In order to be committed and stay committed, you need to have shared interests with your partner. Without mutual interests, you are more likely to drift apart from each other. You can both love watching movies or going to the theater. Perhaps, you enjoy trying new food or riding a bicycle. Being together requires you to spend time with your partner. You definitely need to have things you are both passionate about. It can be anything starting from hiking and ending with opera as long as you both enjoy it.
Neither you nor your partner should pretend to be interested in a particular activity. This should be something you both are interested in. You need to look forward to, for example, climbing a new mountain together, which would not only be time spent together but a challenge you overcome together. Same way you can try to be a team and play tennis as a pair against another team of two. Acting like this would prove that together you are better, stronger, and happier than separately.
There are limitless possibilities to enjoy spending time together. You can do a lot of things and in the process, your attraction to each other is going to get stronger. If you are willing to make a commitment, prepare to spend a lot of time with the person you love and enjoy every second of it.
What do you think about family?
Relationships of the partners who are both willing to make a commitment is a first step towards building a family. Therefore, you need to be clear about your attitude to children and marriage. Try not to avoid these important elements. Sooner or later you and your partner will eventually find yourselves thinking about marriage and children. You need to be on the same page because it takes two to make a baby and raise a human being. It also takes two to get married. Are you okay with marriage and children? What does your partner think about it? Do you accept opinions of each other on the matter?
Your Sex Life: Is It Any Good? Can It Be Better? Are You Okay With It?
To be happy in a relationship and to express commitment fully, you are expected to be comfortable with your partner sexually. Your partner should also be comfortable with you. The importance of sexual intercourse in the long-term relationships simply cannot be overestimated. When a man is ready to commit he is confident about his lover as the only suitable sexual and life partner. Your sexual life with the one and only you care for is a significant foundation of your commitment.
Confidence and Trust: Do You Have Them?
Serious long-term relationships are built on trust, confidence, and mutual support. Your partner should definitely be confident in you and your relationships. Trust is not only defined by sexual faithfulness. Trust between the partners requires support and care. At any time, disregarding the circumstances, you are expected to provide help to your partner and ask for help as well. Confidence and trust are built day after day. Treat little tasks with attention.
Do not lie even about the smallest thing or stay silent instead of sharing something. It is impossible to achieve trust in relationships instantly. One may spend years in order to solidify and strengthen trust. Trust in relationships is a tricky thing. It is difficult to obtain but easy to lose. So be cautious – people do not usually open easily but they can easily become afraid.
What About Your Finances?
Relationship counselors strongly advise people involved in personal relationships to be financially independent. This way no one in the relationships is going to use money to manipulate the side in need. Arguments about money are a great issue in the relationships. Partners do not always earn and spend equally. This fact causes inequality to appear because the absence of money makes one side dependent and less capable of securing individual position.
Do You Think About the Future?
When you ask yourself “Am I ready for a committed relationship?” think about whether you can or can’t rely on your partner entirely and completely. Then, ask yourself whether you you’ll be able to help your partner whenever it is necessary. You may think you are not ready for commitment when you have doubts regarding yours and your partner’s confidence in each other. In other words, everything may be okay today but will it still be okay in 10 years? Making a commitment is a serious long-term decision which requires you to think strategically.
Fear of commitment, feelings of insecurity, stress, and distrust are signs of commitment issues. Overcoming fear of commitment is possible by talking with your partner. Try to talk everything through. Have a conversation about kids, sex, your parents, your past, your feelings, opinions, thoughts, and ideas. Express and explore what holds you together and why either or both of you have fear of commitment.
Do You Even Want to Make a Commitment?
This is the most important question of all. Do you really need to stay with your chosen partner as long as possible? Do you want to have a family with your partner? Do you care, love, and support your partner? Do you like spending time with your partner? After answering all these complex questions you should have a certain answer for the main question. Do you need and do you want to commit? Consider a possibility of being alone or staying in the relationships that are not serious. Even though family is something all people naturally want, still not all people are fit for commitment.
Remember one crucial aspect: it is better not to be in the relationships at all than to be in an unhappy relationship. Think about your relationships: are you happy? Is your partner happy? If the answer is affirmative then you should make a commitment. Don’t use commitment as a path to happiness or a way to get a hold of your partner. Make a commitment only if you are already happy together.
Commitment is all about the future. If you’re not happy now, then by making a commitment you only move your current condition into the future. You may even worsen it. Therefore, make a commitment only if you are definitely sure about what you are doing and why you are doing it. Cultivate inner realization of your attitude towards your partner.
Is Commitment a Necessary Thing?
Commitment in a relationship is a very necessary thing. Without commitment, there is nothing really important about the relationships. Making a commitment is what makes human couples different from animals mating in the wild. Sex is natural. Everything beyond sex like attention, care, support, interest, and happiness come from mind, soul, and heart. Involve your soul, heart, and mind in relationships if you want to make a commitment. Seeing it, your partner will meet you halfway. Be happy together and stay committed to each other if that is what you both want.
