Leo Tolstoy said in one of his novels that all happy families are alike. Indeed, if we have a closer look at happy couples, we’ll notice that they do similar things to keep their relationships strong and healthy. Or they do those things because they are happy? The secret of a harmonious relationship is simple. Two partners should put the same amount of effort into the development of their relationship. Happy couples have a number of habits and rituals that help them keep their connection strong. But before we go into detail, let’s figure out what being in a healthy relationship means?
Basics of Healthy Relationships
One can often see the attribute “healthy” before the word “relationship”. It’s difficult to describe the essence of this phrase because it’s quite generalized. If we ask experienced couples, they’ll say that a healthy relationship is the one in which partners love and respect each other, communicate openly, love each other for who they are not for who they want each other to be. Primarily, they are friends and only then – lovers. They have similar interests and life values, so they always have something to talk about. Being in a healthy relationship, partners feel comfortable, happy, satisfied, and optimistic. They support, encourage, and inspire each other. Although it’s a committed relationship, they don’t feel any burden. They live their life but share it with the person they love.
Here is a list of those small things happy partners do in a harmonious relationship.
- Going to bed together.
Have you ever heard or overheard your parents talking about their working day and discussing plans for tomorrow lying in their bed? According to relationship experts, this is a very useful habit. Physical contact, communication, and sleeping next to your loved one – this is a recipe for happiness. You exchange positive energy and feel the wonderful power of touching. Even if you’ve had a fight, don’t sleep in separate rooms. Go to sleep in one bed – it will facilitate your reconciliation.
- Not restricting each other’s freedom.
Some couples do all the things and spend all the time together. However, this habit can’t be called the necessary attribute of a happy relationship. Although they are in a committed relationship, partners realize that they are still independent personalities with their own interests and tastes. Sometimes they need to spend time with their friends. Each of the partners also needs those moments when they can stay alone. For example, a woman may want to go shopping solo and a man may want to spend the whole Saturday in his garage. In a healthy relationship, partners respect each other’s freedom and understand that it’s important to spend time on one’s own at times.
- Sharing plans for the future.
Successful couples view their lives as their common project. That’s why they constantly share their thoughts and plans with each other to understand each other better and make sure they are on the same page. They discuss how they see their couple in 1 year, 5 years, or 10 years. They talk about such areas as health, finances, everyday life, etc. They vocalize where they want to go on a vacation, what they want to learn or achieve during the next year or next few years. If a couple has a project or a plan, they know where they’re going and it makes things clear.
- Expressing gratitude and appreciation.
In an unhappy relationship, partners forget to say “thank you” or they don’t think it’s necessary to be thankful for minor things. The situation is different with happy couples – they thank each other for a cup of tea, for bringing a warm rug, and other small favors. Of course, they express their gratitude for the more substantial help. You’ll agree that when we hear the words of gratitude, we get encouraged to do something more for our partners, we genuinely want to please them. We realize that our efforts were noticed and appreciated, they were not in vain.
- Communicating their concerns.
Partners who know a thing or two about developing a harmonious relationship solve problems before they become overwhelming. This is because they’re aware of the power of timely dialogs during which they can bring all the worrying matters up. When you keep your worries to yourself and write different scenarios in your head without letting your partner know what bothers you, you’re poisoning yourself and your relationship. Happy partners just sit down and talk things over.
- Having their rituals.
Every family allegedly has their own rituals and habits that help them feel their unity. They do those things regularly and effortlessly because those are pleasant things, actually. For example, many partners don’t leave home in the morning without a goodbye kiss. Some couples exchange messages during the day while others share funny pictures and songs in social networks. A good habit is to spend the weekend (or at least one day a week) together or with kids somewhere far from a big city.
- Viewing their unlikeness as an advantage.
It’s important that partners have similar interests and values but it’s OK if they have some differences. For happy couples, dissimilarity is great because it adds bright colors to their relationship. They don’t try to change each other, smooth over the rough spots, and make the other partner be more similar to them. They know this contrast makes their life more interesting.
- Paying compliments.
Happy couples never forget to compliment their significant others even after years of married life. No matter how long you’ve been together, you should constantly show your partner that you care. The easiest way to do that is to praise your partner for minor and significant accomplishments, say nice words, and make compliments. Your partner should know that you still find him or her attractive and seductive. A happy wife regularly receives compliments from her husband and a happy husband is constantly praised and inspired by his loving spouse.
- Controlling their jealousy.
Jealousy is inevitable but if it grows into paranoia, it will gradually kill your relationship. Happy partners experience jealousy but they know how to control it and avoid poisoning the other partner’s feelings. They resort to humor, hints, and meaningful glances to communicate their concerns without coming across as a jealous man or woman. Basically, partners get jealous if they have some troubles with establishing trust in their couple. The important thing is to learn to control this destructive feeling.
- Turning a blind eye to partner’s flaws.
Accepting your partner for who they are is one of the determinants of a happy relationship. Your significant other has a lot of traits that you appreciate very much. He or she has also some weakness/flaws but you shouldn’t focus your attention on them. All people make mistakes but happy partners can forgive and avoid making a storm in a teacup.